I’ve turned into my own dorky nightmare
So today is the day. My son who has spent four years of his life with a nanny got on a school bus by himself and went to Pre-K. I seriously had to pour myself a bottle of gin to get through my nerves last night.
I wasn’t really nervous about school per se – for me it was more about THE BUS. I have this huge fear of my son getting off the bus, becoming confused and walking into oncoming traffic while his teachers gab about what they’re going to eat for lunch. I know, I’m totally projecting my own morning conversations about my lunch plans onto my son’s teachers who I’m sure are very conscientious.
Anyhoo, in order to prevent any disasters from happening to my firstborn, I literally labeled everything he owns with all of our personal information. There were safety pins, ribbons, markers and stickers involved. And I’m not even exaggerating. I stopped myself at tattooing my cell phone number to his bicep. But trust me, the thought did cross my crazy mind.
Now if I was smart, I would of thought ahead and ordered stickers with his info on them from Party Prints 4U. Or I would of inserted a microchip so I could check his whereabouts at all times. What? Too much?
He’s off at school now. Well I’m assuming he’s at school. Oh Gawd, what if he never made it to school? Pouring myself a bloody mary…